Burnout (Levi x Reader)

He grips the bar tightly between his hands.


"Hm."


He has hawk-like focus.


The whistle blows.


He runs toward his target


The pole turns exactly where he planned it

He takes to the air like a graceful dove


Flips over the bar


Lands on his back.


Perfect.


"Another good jump, Levi!" coach Shadis yelled from across the track.

"Ha. Take that, brat." He says to himself, or so he thinks.

"Shut the fuck up, Ackerman!"

"(L/n! What did I tell you about language!" Coach Shadis yelled at ______. "Well, your jump was excellent, but you still didn't beat ______'s personal record. Work harder."

Levi dreaded those words. Not individually, but put together in a sentence they made him want to vomit. The hell did he mean, 'didn't beat ______'?!


"Everyone head inside and call it a day."


As the track team headed inside their locker rooms to shower, Levi walked beside ______. This was actually not an uncommon sight. Despite their obvious rivalry, they were often seen together. Granted, usually they were always competing in something, but they seemed to only speak to each other. It made sense to think that they'd never said a kind thing to anyone at all. Well, Levi had other friends. Doesn't mean he was a ray of sunshine to them.

Also they lived on the same street and walked home together even though they were past driving age. Believe that they also, at some point, competed on who could get their driver's license first. They were both terrible drivers and had to wait a few months to take the test again.


Levi subtly stuck a foot out, intending for ______ to fall.
She reached an arm out for his track jersey and took him down with her. ______ stepped on his back and bolted for the locker room doors with Levi tailing right behind her. ______ yanked it open, nearly hitting Levi in the face and slamming it shut and locking it.

"Open the door!" Levi shouted.

"No!"

"Open it!"

"This is the girl's locker room, dumbass!"

The rest of the track team didn't even laugh, it was that common an occurrence.

.. She won today.




----

AP history.

The Crusades, Magellan, the real story of Christopher Columbus's voyage to find India, vast and glorious empires and their rulers.

Levi's score on today's test: A+

______ score: A, because she thought Levi wouldn't answer the extra credit problems because he was an arrogant bastard like always.

______ walked out the classroom with a tomato red face of embarrassment, Levi right behind her.

"Loser," he whispered in her ear.

"Fuckass."

"What in god's name is a fuckass?"

"Oh, go to hell, Ackerman!"

"You've run out of insults, haven't you?"

"Go the hell away!" ______ yelled, hurrying ahead of him. Levi caught up to her.

"Hey ______," Levi asked with no reply.

"Hey brat, I'm talking to you!" Still no reply. Levi tugged at her ear. "You go deaf or something?"

Then, like lightning, she roughly shoved Levi against a locker in the hallway, creating a large crash that drew lots of attention, and hurried off.

"Bitch." He muttered in satisfaction, because the day wasn't even over yet and he knew he'd won.



-----

______ stood alone under the bleachers as Levi was on the field, practicing. When he wasn't at track and field practice with her, he was at football practice with his buddies, Erwin and Mike. When he wasn't at either of those places after school, he was at a student council meeting, tennis, or swim practice with ______.

"He's an idiot, he does all these extracurriculars and he hates people," muttered to herself.

"Why am I even here? I shouldn't be here, I have cheer practice right now. Or was it student council?" _______ sighed discontentedly. She turned around to face the support beam she was leaning against and rested her forehead on it.


At that moment, ______ had an epiphany. Why on god's green earth was she even rivaled with Rivalle?

He was, is- a complete narcissist, a clean freak on disturbing levels, and had an ego as inflated as a bouncy castle. Not to mention the only one he ever followed around and bothered was ______.

He had Mike and Erwin to duke it out with athletically, and Hanji was also there to get on his nerves. Now that she thought about it, she didn't recall ever even having a conversation with them.

Or anyone else, really.


"Oh god.. I don't have any friends.."


_______ slumped down to the ground.

"So.. I've just been in this pointless battle with Ackerman my whole life for no reason?"

"I've wasted.. so much time.."

And it was then that _______ stood back up, collected her backpack its contents, and ran like a motherfucker back home.
When she got home, all she could do was cry and and angrily mourn the time she wasted on a boy who hated her as much as she hated him. Except now her hate was, at least, somewhat justified.




----

"I'm handing out your tests from last week, and frankly, I'm disappointed," Mr. Pixis announced as he passed the graded sheets around the room. "Well, I'm disappointed in you, ______."

"Wake up, shithead!" Levi flicked the back of ______'s head, harshly waking her. "You flunked this test, too. That's the fourth one this week." He chuckled. "I guess you suddenly suck at pre-cal, too."

"Go to hell," ______ said groggily before going back to sleep and dreamt of a world where Rivalle Ackerman did not exist. Hypothetically, that world did exist, and _______ wanted to live there.

But, alas, she was stuck here.

Poor, poor, ______.




----

All eyes were on ______ as she walked into her advanced English class with bloodshot red eyes and smelling awful.

"Hiiii," she smiled as she waved her fingers at the class and laughed.

"Holy fucking shit, you came to class high!" Hanji laughed.

Levi merely squinted his eyes at her in disgust. His most powerful rival turned into some pot-smoking burnout in the span of a month.


"Miss (l/n)!" yelled Mr. Hannes. "Why are you showing up to class so late and smelling terrible?"

"Um, if I may answer Mr Hannes," Mike began, "I think its because she just smoked some dank ass kush." Mike took a long whiff. "That's something expensive, I can tell."

"Some underclassmen named Reindeer or Rainer or something said he had some brownies." ______ laughed. "That wasn't no brownie, but I ain't complaining."

"Principal's office, now."

"Now, now-now to be fair Mr Hannes, I've seen that expensive stuff you keep in your desk drawers!"

"Now!"

Levi took it upon himself to get up and drag ______ out of the classroom and to the office.

"You disgust me," he snarled before opening the glass door to the office, shoving her in, and storming off.


Levi also took it upon himself to pick ______ after detention once her high had worn off and take her home.

But..

"Get off me, Ackerman. You've done nothing but ruin my fucking life."

"You're the one smoking pot in school. Now let's go, we have a student council meeting."

"Not me. They kicked me out after I poured a bunch of kool-aid packets in the swimming pool. Got kicked out of swimming, too. Wasn't nearly enough kool-aid to get me in trouble, though so I got a warning."

"Why the fuck would you pour kool-aid powder in the pool?"

"Um, to make a kool-aid pool, obviously. Grape and cherry flavored."

______ headed home, with a warning from Levi.

"You'd better not smoke in school again or I'll kick your ass."

"Doesn't mean I can't smoke before school."




------

Levi didn't know if ______ was skipping class, skipping school altogether, or at in-school suspension.

Either way, she was being a pain in his ass.

She really had quit all her extracurricular activities and either slept in class or showed up high.

He no longer saw her at track, swimming, or tennis. She didn't sit in the stands and did homework in the stands of the stadium when cheer practice was over. The vice president of the student body was replaced by Petra Ral. He didn't even see her coming in or out of her house when he was at home. She suddenly dropped everything and shut herself off from the rest of the world.

Gah, he was so distracted he wanted to slap himself!


Sure, Auruo Bossard was competing with him as well, but he wasn't even worth worrying about compared to ______. Levi didn't even know he was a student council historian until he confronted him for 'trying to steal Petra away' from him. Hell, Petra was pretty cute! Not like Levi had noticed. He was too damn busy paying attention to ______ of all people!

No wonder people were always asking if he'd ever had a girlfriend.

Answer: he had, once. To make ______ jealous and win a bet as to who would have their first kiss before the other.

By all things holy, ______ was the only girl he had ever paid any attention to!


Who the fuck even cares? I've stressed out more from being constipated than from losing to that turd.


"Go the fuck away."

"Aw, I just wanna talk!"

"Hanji, I swear to god."

"She's alright Levi, she's not really bothering anyone," Mike excused Hanji as she sat between him and an umderclassman friend of hers, Moblit Berner.

"I want to eat in peace," Levi exhaled.

"Hey Erwin, I heard Nile's thinking of asking Marie out." Mike said to Erwin. Erwin frowned and said, "it's not my business who she decides to date. I can't right now anyway, I'm busy with football and student council."

"Ah yes, our treasurer. Dubbed 'thee whose budget is tighter than his asshole'." Hanji joked, earning laughs from Moblit and Mike.


A moment of silence fell upon the group before Erwin cut it as suddenly as one cuts the cheese while laughing. Except now they weren't laughing.

"Okay, Levi, you're driving me nuts, what is happening with you?" Erwin asked.

"Yeah, you're silent, but like an angry silent."

"You don't usually sit here, either."

After not getting an answer from Levi's stubborn (or perhaps constipated?) ass, Hanji managed to figure it out, maybe.

"You mad cause Auruo keeps bothering you? It's really nothing, it's just that he's liked Petra since forever and she seems to really like you."

"It's nothing, dammit! I'm bored as hell!" he accidentally blurted.

The other four at the table exchanged glance of collective underground before going ohhhhh…

"What the hell was that about?" Levi hissed.

"You miss ______!" Hanji squeaked.

Levi, having had e-fucking-nough, threw away the rest of his lunch and walked off.

Moblit let out a sigh of relief. "That guy is scary!"




-----

Levi had had enough.

He was going to find out exactly what had happened to _______ and revert her back to her normal, pain-in-the-ass self. And he knew where to look for her.

He'd heard a rumor that she was hanging around some pothead underclassmen behind the gym after school.

Sure enough, there she was. With her was this ice queen looking girl with a big nose, a tall, nervous-looking fidgety guy who also had a big nose, and a big buff guy who just sat giggling at how high he was. ______ was rolling a joint when Levi found her- she'd just gotten here.

Perfect.

Levi was lazily greeted by the giggling one and offered a puff before yanking ______'s shirt collar and dragging her off with him. ______ put up a fight all the way to the end of the school zone where he finally let go and grabbed her wrist.
When she still struggled, Levi did something he swore in a million years he'd never do and fit his fingers in the spaces between hers.

But this was _______, so of course she struggled anyway.



----

Levi dragged _______ into his house, upstairs, to his room, closed the door behind them, and pinned her against it.

"Levi, whatever problem you have with me won't be solved by angry sex."

"What the absolute fuck makes you think I'd ever sleep with you?!"

"Well.. you've got me pinned against a door, your knee is in between my legs, and you're too goddamn close to my face. Hm, I hope you bite my neck or something, that shit is hot."


Levi backed away from _______ who wasn't the least bit threatened by him anymore, grabbed her hand, and sat her down on his bed.

______ smirked and said, "At least take me out on a few dates first, Levi."

"What is the matter with you?"

"Whatever do you speak of?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Hey, I'm sorry I got you mad, I just honestly thought you wanted to do me. Not my fault."

"Why did you suddenly give up?" Levi asked quietly.

______ looked at him uneasily and looked away. "...I'm going home."

"No. Tell me."

"It's none of your business, Ackerman. It's never been your business what I do, so stay out of it."

Levi 'tsk'ed. "Liar, it's always been my business. And you aren't leaving until I get a valid answer."


----

"You've sat like that for half an hour, just spit it out already."

"I don't want to talk to you anymore. You're toxic." ______ murmured.

"What's that mean?"

______ looked disgusted. "It means what you think it does. You're terrible for me and my mental health. So please don't ever talk to me again."

"No, I'm not taking that," Levi denied her. "Give me a real answer. I want to know why you quit everything and why you always sleep in class or show up high."

"Well I want to know why you even care! You've never given two shits about me before, and all of a sudden you think you're my parent?"

"Where are yours, anyway?"

"Trying to deal with me, so I don't see why you need to interfere."

"I care because without you I'm bored."


...Shit.


"So I'm just your entertainment? You've wasted my life just to make me your plaything?" _______'s voice broke. "I hate you so much."

"That came out sorta wrong."

"No, I see exactly how it is."

"Listen, just tell me already!"


"You ruined my life, Levi!

All I've ever known is to try and be better than you and for what?! It's never gotten me anywhere! You're always going to win, I get it!

I've so blinded by yours and my arrogance that I don't even have any friends! When I'm not trying to one-up you, I'm lonely! You have Erwin and Mike who talk to you. Nobody ever comes up to me and asks me how I'm doing. And I have zero social skills due to zero interaction with others. You have no purpose in my life except to burden me with expectations that I will never be able to meet!

And do you know why I hadn't realized this up until now? Because I was happy on some days, because I could sleep knowing that I had beaten you. But there's absolutely no point in that. So I have pushed myself to the limit for no fucking reason other than to say 'I'm better than Levi at something'.

But nobody ever stopped and told me that what I was doing was beyond pointless! I'm not happy beating you anymore! I'm not happy at all! I don't think I ever have been! I hope you liked your answer!" ______ yelled at Levi in all her agony.


Levi sat on a chair propped in front of the door so _______ couldn't leave.

"Let me go home."

…

"Levi, please."

"Erwin and Mike are nothing compared to you. I don't feel a surge of adrenaline go through me when I'm trying to beat them."

"Good for me."

"No, you don't understand." Levi defended.

"Enlighten me, then."

Levi took a deep breath and exhaled. "The deal between us is that we're always at each others throats. Always trying to suffocate the other in defeat.

Me, I like it. I need you to keep lunging for my throat to make me feel like I'm doing something right. Of course, I never realized until now that it hurt you, but I've always liked it." Levi explained coolly.

_______ stood up and walked to the door that Levi was still sitting in front of. "Please, let me go home. My parents'll worry."

Levi exhaled and stood up, then took the chair away and opened the door for her. He watched through the window as _______ somberly trudged across the street and past a few houses, and entered her home.

Little did he know, it was the last he would see of her for a while.



------

"_______ hasn't even bothered to come to school for a while now. I hope she's doing alright." Hanji worried.

"I heard she transferred to some other school."

"You guys do realize that even if she doesn't come to school, it won't make a difference? We all have all of our credits and we're graduating in a few weeks, anyway." Nanaba pointed out.

"So why bother showing up then, huh?" Levi said.

"For Mike."

"I heard that she was going to the supplementary school." Mike said.

"Guys, just let it go. She'll probably show up to graduation or prom. At least I hope so." Hanji said as she munched on a chicken wing.

Levi was pissed, to say the least. "What do you mean you hope so? You've been going to school together for four years and you've barely spoken more than a few words to her."

"Chill, Levi!" Hanji backed herself up. "I just thought it's weird not seeing her around."

"Well, it's not like you see her anywhere anywhere else, or ask her shit about herself."

"I was just saying Levi!"

"You know what, I'm out of here."

"Levi!"



-----

*pang*

*pang*

*pang*

"Open the fucking window, you piece of shit!"

_______ opened up the window to her second story bedroom and looked out to see Levi standing on the grass of her front yard. His own room across the street was lit up to make his parents think he was still there.

"Maybe if you had knocked on the front door instead of being a cliché throwing goddamn rocks, I would've answered sooner! Now what do you want?"


"There's something I wanted to ask."

______ just stared at him, bored.

"Are you going to graduation at the end of the month?" Levi tried not to sound like he was trying to not care, if that makes sense.

_______ picked at her nails. "Yeah. Is that it?"

"Are you going to prom?" Levi asked hesitantly.

"Are you going to bet that you can find a date before I do? Cause I'm done with that schtick." _______ retorted. "And no, in case you couldn't tell."


"Go with me." Levi said, although it was more like a suggestion than a demand, which was almost expected of him. The demand part, I mean.

_______ spat at him, although it landed on the sidewalk in front of the porch, not at Levi, like she had intended. "Prom is dumb."

"No shit. But it'll be even dumber going stag."

"And your first choice was me of all people? What about that cute redhead who's got the hots for you?"

"Who, Petra?" Really? Like he knew any other redheads?

"Yeah, what about her?"

"I'm asking you, you turd! Do you want to go with me or not? I'll.. help you get a dress and all that crap and hang with you the whole time." Levi couldn't even look at _______ while saying that..

_______ stayed quiet for a while, thinking.


Levi, frustrated, said, "You know what, it was stupid to ask in the first place. Forget I said anything." Levi kicked the grass and turned away to go home.

"This is the first time we've ever talked without being at each other's throats."

"Yeah, what of it?" Levi asked bitterly as he stopped in his tracks.

"You bitch, this is the first time I haven't wanted to kill you! This is important!"

"It really isn't."

"Well, it is to me! I've never had a regular conversation with anybody before, you know?"

Levi's face softened just a teensy bit before turning around to look at her again. "Yeah, I guess this is important. So do you want to go to prom or not?"


"Is blue okay?"

"I'm drycleaning and ironing your dress the night before."

"Buy me a corsage."

"Buy me a lint roller."

"Get us a ride."

Levi headed home.

"I'll pick you up three Saturdays from now at 6:00. You better be ready."



-----

"Levi's not coming, is he?" Hanji lamented as hung on to Erwin's arm.

"He's been complaining for weeks about how stupid prom is, why would he?" Nanaba answered as she smoothed out Mike's lapels.

"That boy is a liar." Mike said.

"What makes you think so?" asked Erwin.

"Well, he just showed up. With a date. That happens to be _______."

The rest of the group, appalled, looked toward the entrance of the hotel ballroom where Levi had in fact, arrived with a date. Yup, it was them. ______ and Levi's ensembles were matching and everything.


"That's adorable!" Hanji squealed. "Who ever thought we'd see them together like that? I've gotta go say hi-"

"No," Erwin stopped her. "Let them be. Even if they are a sight to behold."


----

"Let's get an apartment." Levi suggested (read: demanded) in the middle of a slow dance. Hanji literally dragged them onto the dance floor. Like they'd ever voluntarily dance with each other. Ha.

"No."

"Why the fuck not? We're going to the same college."

"You're being totally out of character. Next thing I know, you're going to try shoving a ring onto my finger."

"Goddamnit, just get an apartment with me while we're at university! It'll be cheaper." Levi stressed.

"We're going on a full scholarship."


Levi stared at her with a just-how-fucking-dense-are-you glare.

She thought for a minute, stood in her lightbulb moment for a sec and stared back with a are-you-for-fucking-real face.

Levi countered with a naw-im-just-kidding-YES-IM-SERIOUS look.

________ answered with an ohhhhhhh face. Then an Oh face.


"Since when?!"

"I can't say, maybe it was when all this shit went downhill, I don't know."

"Well shit, I don't know what to say.."

"The preferable answer would be yes, idiot. But when you do, you've got to stop being such a fucking pothead. I hate the smell."

"Let's get an apartment."



----

_______, as Levi discovered at his graduation party, was pretty damn shy. She liked Nanaba, Mike, and Erwin, even if they were a bit intimidating, but Hanji and his adopted dad Kenny scared the crap out of her.

Eh, she'll get used to it.


After the guests had left and _______ and Levi were relaxing in his unbelievably tidy room, he invited her to lay on his bed him. She reluctantly accepted.

"Shoes off." he warned.


"You know, I see where you get your toilet humor from." _______ laughed.

"I swear to god, don't ever talk about him like he's not a piece of shit." Levi groaned. "_______, just make to make it really fucking clear, I want to move in with you because I like you. Alright?"

"Does this make you my friend?" _______ naively asked.

"I didn't mean that kind of like. But sure, why not?"

"So this is that 'more-than-friends' thing I used to hear about?"

"Yeah, exactly." Levi furrowed his brows. "Scratch that, it is if you want to be. I completely understand if you don't feel the same way. Even if you don't, I'll deal with it."

"Hey, Levi. You're pretty cute when you're not spewing obscenities. I've never seen this Levi before." _______ smiled. "This soft Levi. I think I like this Levi better. I think I like you altogether."

"But now that I think about it, I've never seen this side of myself, either. It feels.. fluffy." ______ observed as she played with her thumbs.

"I think you're just tired."

"Really? I don't feel tired. I feel.. like.. I feel all soft and fluffy. You know? I feel really good."


The two laid in Levi's bed in silence for a while, not cuddling or even touching. Just, for the first time, enjoying each other's company. And happy at the fact that they, in such a short amount of time, cracked each other open to see what was actually there.

Then they got to thinking, maybe if they had spent less time fighting, they could have had a lot more of these moments together. They could have been friends for years, maybe even more than that. Granted, with Levi's difficult personality it still would have taken time, but at least less time than this.

Way less time to realize that _______'s cheeks were really pink when she got warm or that her hair looked really soft or that her eyes were so sparkly.

Less time to realize that Levi did, in fact, possess the capacity to smile like he was doing now, or that his eyes were the shiniest gray, or his hands looked smaller than they were.

So, _______ promised Levi that she would stop smoking and return to her studies, and Levi promised he wouldn't let her stress herself out because of it. And he took a lock of her hair between his fingers and she giggled when he brought it to his lips and kissed it, and when he did she knew that the rivalry was finally over and they both smiled at the thought that they could finally have the kind of relationship that they, deep in their subconscious knew they desperately wanted. And that, despite everything, they regretted none of their decisions that had lead here.